It seems that yesterday and today are getting tougher than the previous day. Perhaps after seeking help, I unconsciously have higher expectation on myself, that I can change directly.
So although I made some progresses, I hate myself when I could not decide again when something pops up. I also want things to progress fast, get done one by one. When I have the moody feelings, I tolerate less as I thought I should not have this feeling.
So now I start to feel blank again. I know that it does not make sense to be stressed because of having stress. I just need to let go and accept the fact that I am still unable to make decision clearly on simple things. I need to relax and then do little changes.
Be patient, have hope.
When there are things to learn, enjoy it instead of condemning myself of not knowing those things. Enjoy the silence, enjoy the gathering. It is fine to make mistakes, learn a little bit and move on.
Time is irreversible. So it is not possible to look back on things that have already happened. Be in the present, do what I can first, instead of worrying the things that anyway I cannot do it now.
Do not give up, there were times that you could not do something and finally you were able to go through it. It may be super slow, but keep making progress.
Embrace the consequences, do not live to avoid negative outcome. Take the risk and move on. Because not making decision also has risk, probably higher.
Tomorrow may be better, may not be better, but that’s okay too. For it is the journey that counts. Observe the moody feeling, no need to run away. It is something to be embraced, not to be avoided. It is not a threat.
My worth does not depend on what I do. Christ already paid the price. Be faithful on what is trusted, no need to be more.
I am sleepy now. Do what I can remember to do, the rest continue again tomorrrow. Appreciate the present.
No comments:
Post a Comment