Vaccine: I still need to do it whether it is now or later

There was a funny video where a boy screaming and asking for forgiveness from God when he was about to receive vaccine. Interestingly, in my wife’s last year class, no one cried. That is because she prepared them first and briefed them that the vaccine is for their own good. They also learned that if they postpone, they would still need to do it at a higher cost. So they bear the little pain and move on.

I often postpone because I cannot stand my anxiety, or I cannot stand seeing the quality of the work if I do within a short time. In other word, if I don’t do something, at the end I still need to do it and at a higher cost. Of course it is not possible to change over night. But this is something I need to accept and keep telling myself.

Also, it was interesting to see yesterday on how I struggled for not doing something significant. I slept a lot yesterday and watched drama. Perhaps because I had many things postponed, it was not guilt free. Another is my need for acceptance and approval is so high. So maybe this period also acts as a vaccine to build my ability to live independently without acceptance and approval from others based on my performance.