Today it’s not that bad, but I also had difficulty to concentrate doing one by one like yesterday. At the end several small items get done. But a lot of time was wasted in the inability to decide. And the temptation to run away from deciding is very big.
One thing to remember is that it will just be worse if I scold myself or if I hate myself because of this. Remember that it is already a habit to procrastinate. So it is understable if I have difficulties and fall again and again. The right response is to get back up again and again.
And expect that things are not smooth, I will fall again. That’s fine as the goal is to strengthen the skill to get back up.
Likewise, about the feeling. There is no need to run away from the uncomfortable feeling. Acknowledge it, embrace it, bear with it until it gets better again, rather than telling myself that I can’t stand that feeling or I can’t stand doing what’s needed when the feeling is there.
Find alternative. There is no need to control what is uncertain. Embrace uncertainty. Trust myself that God’s grace is sufficient for me to go through all these. Learn to be thankful. Let go the desire to be savior, embrace the imperfection. Remember life is worth more than success and smooth life and comfort.
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