As practice is important, I need to be thankful for the chance to practice disputing my irrational beliefs. Like now I start to scolding myself again. Of course it appears to be reasonable. For example, I failed again to be on time. I am 10 min late for my appointment. And because yesterday I already wrote about cooling down time, I expect myself to be better today but it is not enough for me. At the end I was forced not to rush as I walked to the bus stop with my friend - and so I could not run. But that means I underestimate the time.
In office, there are certain things get done today. At the same time I realized that I made mistake in communication that the deadline may not be met.
So the question is again how does being angry to myself help? Isn’t it more destructive. Like now I start to feel headache.
Just like pilates analogy, I need to accept that I cannot do certain things at this stage or in the near future. So it does not mean that knowing things such as not trying to get people approval can be automatically be applied. It takes time and the time quite long. So we need to be patient. And even if I fail to be patient, I can get back up again and acknowledge things were wrong instead of denying or trying to compensate on unnecessary things.
Let’s continue to practice listen but not necessarily reacting, observe but not necessarily judging. And identify what are the musts that I create such as I must be perfect, I must not upset people, I must improve big enough or fast enough.
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